The best mentors won't find you,
You have to find them.
My core values for career development:
• Ownership - Taking responsibility for your growth
• Courage - Moving through discomfort for what matters
• Reciprocity - Creating value, not just taking it
What I can't stand is seeing people wait for career opportunities while mistaking passivity for patience.
Here's how to ask potential mentors (without feeling awkward):
1/ Be direct about your goals
Don't beat around the bush. Tell them exactly what you need.
"I was promoted to senior engineer and want to level up my systems architecture skills. Would you be willing to mentor me?"
2/ Tell them why you chose them
People appreciate knowing what drew you to them specifically, showing you’ve done your homework.
"I'm reaching out because of your experience leading engineering teams at high-growth startups."
3/ Start with a small ask
Don't request a long-term commitment right away.
"Would you be open to a 30-minute video call to connect?"
4/ Be gracious if rejected
Sometimes people don't have bandwidth. That's okay.
"I understand you have significant demands on your time."
5/ Ask for alternatives
If they decline, their network might be your next opportunity.
"Is there anyone you'd recommend I connect with instead?"
6/ Approach with the right mindset
Confidence in your goals. Respect for their time. Gratitude for their expertise.
I've seen too many careers stall because of fear of rejection.
But I promise: The temporary discomfort of reaching out is nothing compared to the permanent pain of career stagnation.
Stop waiting for the perfect mentor to appear.
Make the first move today.
What strategies have worked for you when finding mentors?
